My 25 Random Things Song | Margaret Cho Official Site

My 25 random things, in song form!

I like spring
The LA Kings
And leather cockrings
These are my 25 random things

I wish I had the sweetest voice in the world
My hair will never stay perfectly curled
Whatever I do, is with enthusiasm
Some days I can have multiple orgasms!

When I was 10 my dog died of mange
I had to go to FBI camp to learn to shoot at close range
I have done shots of vodka with Mikhail Gorbachev
And once on CNN I told Jerry Falwell to fuck off

I like romantic flings
And feathery wings
Iâ€™ve been to Beijing
These are my 25 things

My favorite place in the world is my bed
I can spend days there just giving head
My favorite comic is Dave Chappelle
When I eat squid sometimes my lips swell

I donâ€™t drink champagne it just makes me hurl
I like boys and I really like girls
I ran away from home at sixteen
Late at night I canâ€™t have caffeine

I love to sing
And eat chicken wings
I admire Martin Luther King
These are my 25 random things

9 thoughts on “My 25 Random Things Song”

DON’T EAT SQUID!

Someday it will be your throat that swells, not your lips.

I don’t get the 25 things thing but I can try:

1. Sometimes I swear my unclean feet smell like buttered popcorn, but nobody agrees.
2. I used to think my sister was a vampire. Now I know she’s just stupid.
3. When I smoke pot, everything takes forever and I get impatient, not hungry.
4. When I bought my webcam, I announced the purchase on my blog by saying, NOW I CAN MASTURBATE FOR THE WHOLE WORLD!
5. Chocolate rules. I could snort it all day.
6. When I went to see Margaret Cho on the Beautiful tour here in Atlanta, I had such a blast but there were so many hot bears surrounding me that I kept hoping there’d be an after-show orgy.
7. I haven’t bottomed in so long that my virginity really has grown back. Now all that my ass is good for is making bad smells and screaming (although I’m having an exorcist look into that problem).
8. I really am the CEO of TMI (if you haven’t figured out by now)
9. I tell people I worship Satan, but really, I just lust after him.
10. I want to move to San Francisco and be where people I can identify are, be where the biggest battles are, and be a part of street festivals.
11. I came out in 1999 and in all these years I’m so bored I’m wondering why I bothered. I’d give anything to actually feel like I’m part of the gay community but here in Georgia, there isn’t any. There’s gays, but no community.
12. I’ve never once been involved in any BDSM or S&M leather scene and I think it’s about damned time I am. Where the hell is it???
13. I have written a book about religion and how it’s gone wrong, called “How Christianity Became its Own Antichrist” but I don’t know how to even begin getting it published.
14. I’m terrified for the economic future. I’ve always been poor, now I’m doomed.
15. I’m trying to grow my beard down to my crotch. So far it’s only barely to nipples.
16. I think dogs are the greatest teachers man can have. I think the word PET is actually an acronym standing for Personal Enlightenment Trainer, and that too few people capitalize on it.
17. At night I find myself crying from loneliness more often than not these days.
18. I’ve never owned my own car. Everyone else I know has.
19. I never learned to ride a bicycle either. Everyone else I know can.
20. I was, however, a truckdriver once. 80,000 lbs in a 53 foot trailer were trusted to me, a guy who never owned his own vehicle or learned to ride a bicycle.
21. I’d give anything in the world to sleep beside a kind-eyed furry bear man and wake up to see him still there and know he’ll be there the next morning, and the next morning… but I also want him to be a slut like I am, so we can fuck the entire bear community hand in hand together.
22. I am a nudist. And an exhibitionist. And want to do porn.
23. I really really really hate poop, so I couldn’t watch the “2 Girls 1 Cup” video… but I had no problem watching the “2 Pumpkins 1 Cup” video that parodied it because they used chocolate for poop, and I love chocolate. In fact I watched the video and thought, “Hmmm….. I want some chocolate now.”
24. When I was still closeted, I argued so well for the right wing that I converted my family into Republicans, and now I’m paying the price.
25. I want to know what having a best friend feels like, but I never will.

Holy crap- this thing really did go viral! Love how you made yours into a song… But what tune should we be singing it to?

Avoid the squid, the same thing happens to me with celery! And my tongue gets all tingly. Your 25 random things are interesting… I’m so glad you said that to Jerry Falwell, he’s such an awful prick.