It’s Fashion Week

It is just Fashion Week here in LA, which sounds funny and sad because there is a notion that fashion doesn’t exist here, but oh child, it does, it really does. There is the army of tiny blonde girls with tight, narrow legged bleached out expensive jeans and leather jackets that could have only come […]

The “Fuck It” Diet

I have lost some weight which has set off a strange wave of paranoia among people that I have either had my stomach stapled or shut off with a rubber band, or am on some freaky raw food diet or whatever. What happened was that I was fucking sick and tired of dieting and working […]

Tom Ford

Tom Ford is walking away from Gucci. I am beside myself with grief. Ford and some other dude Domenico De Sole who nobody cares about but is the money side of the famous fashion house are leaving because the shareholders, the Louis Vuitton mafia and the dynamic duo cannot come to an agreement about some […]

All Hail Tha Queen

I remember when I first met Queen Latifah. It was in San Francisco at a huge benefit for AIDS awareness in the early ’90s. She was walking out of the green room and her bodyguard, a large imposing man, gave me a straight arm to get me out of the Queen’s way, and then she […]

See Me

The latest trend in South Korea is getting pubic hair transplants. One would think that it would be the opposite, with salons all over the West serving up specialties like the “Barely Legal,” in which all hair is removed from the area, designed to replicate the genitalia of an underage girl, as statutory rape seems […]

Abstinence

The Roman Catholic Church is talking about how condoms don’t block AIDS. I don’t know what to say about that. And taking the vow of celibacy doesn’t prevent pedophilia. What is wrong with them? If they oppose all forms of birth control, then when do we get to actually fuck? Or how do we get […]

Ann Coulter

People get so pissed off at Ann Coulter. I never really saw her before, but when her name is mentioned in my circles, muthafuckas go off. I realized I needed to do some research on her. Generally, I will read everything and agree somewhat with everyone, even extreme or stupid points of view, because anyone […]

To Arnold

What you talkin’ ’bout ARNOLD?!!! Yo Terminator!You need to stop goosestepping up to the gubernatorial race because you have to terminate your campaign. What the fuck is wrong with you? Bodybuilding is alright and everything, but you are not doing multiple reps, you are making multiple missteps. I got nothing against Austria. I got mad […]

Violence

I cannot get enough of Atmosphere’s new record Seven’s Travels. MC Slug loves the ladies with the low self esteem. Like Beyonce – I am crazy in love, like this kind of thug/playa/rappa love that I have been immersed in for the last few decades. I wrote him a fan letter, but since our tour […]

In the Colombian Parliament

In the Colombian Parliament, MP Luis Eduardo Diaz was suspended for bringing out a rubber dildo during a parliamentary debate. He was using it as a prop, to demonstrate the need for mandatory sterilization to control the birth rate of the poor population of Bogota. After offending many members of Parliament, he lost his temper […]

Paul Hill

Paul Hill was executed for the fatal shooting of a doctor and his wife, family health professionals who cared for and counseled women during termination of pregnancy, as well as the diagnosis and treatment of sexually transmitted diseases, pre and post natal care, all important and vital for women’s health. His day went something like […]