There was this one house I lived in, a very large old victorian in San Francisco, near the hospital by Haight street. The building seemed to be some kind of annex to the hospital, perhaps at one time housing staff or patients who were doing somewhat better or maybe even dying, but it was now just a place for people to rent rooms in.

It wasn’t like a hotel or anything though, just a series of rooms, too many to comprehend. I lived there for several months and never went up the stairs. There were people there I had never even met. The house kept going and going.

I had dreadlocks then, and barely washed, mostly because the bathroom terrified me. The shower floor was slick with a green slime that had grown from years of use without being cleaned. The shower water would only nourish the mildew and mold like it was a sprinkler watering the grass underneath my feet. I felt dirtier after showering and so I just never went in there. I made do in my own room and washed my body piecemeal, feet then head then other parts when needed. I could do this because my room had a small sink and mirror.

I also had a television and there was this extremely beautiful but mysterious and thin couple who lived at the front of the house, and who I believe I did the renting from – I don’t even remember their names, but they kind of went together, like “fee” and “fo” or “di” and “doe” would sometimes be sitting on my futon watching shows, which I didn’t mind but I’d also wish that when I came home late at night they’d stay and keep watching with me rather than skittering quickly out of the room like elegant but insecure cats.

I paid $125 a month, usually in cash and the money would disappear into the giant armholes of a green or grey sweater. Once I saw a little girl down in the hallway across from the scary bathroom, and I said hi, and she didn’t say anything and I just went in my room. It was weird because later I found out there were no children who lived there or visited.

I think about that house and I have driven by it and I wonder who or what is in there now. I left the television behind when I moved because I was determined to be on it rather than watch it and I guess that is what happened.

I wonder about that couple.

I wonder if that was a little girl I saw.

Omg the lights just went out here. Seriously.

2 thoughts on “House

  1. My old boss did the landscaping at a big old house that people thought was haunted- like the renovation crew would turn off their radio and still hear music playing from somewhere they could never find, they were getting pretty freaked out by the time the job was near finished.

    The owners told my boss that lights would go off and on, and she told him that one time when this was happening, she’d pointed to a light and said “OK, if there’s a ghost here I want that light to go out right now”- and it did.

    The story was, a little girl had drowned there. My co-worker said he heard her laughing as he was walking over to me.

  2. interesting story — giving up the ghost. cannot wait to move away from the united states permanently due to the tour over 15 years that i have had here. there are some awesome people but the hate within the gay community when i know the number of people who have done outreach and gone through so much in helping their ungrateful asses. so have a happy pride in ugly vegas!! giving up the ghost during this showcase of molesting creeps — i recall how much i love LA and how awesome LA could have been in trying to find people, see people’s shows, hear people’s music, visit people’s art, yet, ultimately what a flaccid stool and limp tool have been so many petty excuses for men other than stalking, molesting creeps. hey margaret…..funny story. love that…but cannot wait to move away from the united states permanently — just saw the whale rider and was reminded of the colonial spirit cunts on a project in hawaii where these hollywood/new york/amsterdam cliches of urban dope fiends and alcoholics couldn’t get their brains or creativity together to address difficult issues while also facing such awesome beauty. take care.

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