RIP Alexander McQueen

I have one beautiful Alexander McQueen dress. It was tremendously pricey for me, as most of his designs are, but I loved this dress so much I just had to have it. I never wore it before. I just have it, the tags hanging off still, his impressive name bold and big on the silk tag inside. I don’t like to spend too much on clothes, but this dress, I couldn’t pass up, and it was on sale, so I could justify it a little, but it’s too beautiful for me, and I am scared to wear it, because I love Alexander McQueen so much. His imagination and his vision, his love for the female form and his natural and naive yet tremendous ability to manifest the fantastical with effortlessness and ease, because he was like a magic child. Beautiful creature.

I thought I would save the dress for the day that I could play guitar very well. That is what the dress is. It’s called the guitar dress. The front is very simple, like the plain black garments worn by cellists or concert violinists, serious musicians who can’t be constrained by color or shape. Their bodies are extensions of their instruments. They are their instruments. They are their music. The notes are color and design and shape and texture and so they have no need for further adornment. This dress is for the musician I thought I would one day become. When I had no need for further beauty other than myself and my beloved guitar because the music that I made would be adornment enough. But the way these musicians dress is still beautiful, in its elegance and simplicity. It’s poetic in the quiet lines it draws against the body, so not to drown out the glorious sound.

The guitar dress has a special McQueen secret though. The back of the dress has an unexpected, almost shockingly sheer laser cut reverse image of a guitar, following the curve of my hips, the strings running along my spine. I am the instrument; the sound and me and what makes the sound and me are all the same. It’s a cosmic joke with a brilliant punchline. I thought when I would one day wear this dress – I will be this. I am beautiful and simple in the front, and a blessed surprise in the back.

I was saving this special dress, my one and only Alexander McQueen for the day I could do it justice, but I realize my ability and my practicing and the songs I try to make better and better every day in order to one day stand on stage in this dress and play like the dress deserves don’t matter now, because he is gone. And so I put on the dress today. For him. For my beautiful Lee McQueen. I never called him that. I never knew him. But I want to call him that now. Because he felt like family in my psyche, in my heart, in my dreams of beauty and maybe one day being beautiful coming true. Beautiful Lee. I will miss you.

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14 Comments. Add To The Mix…

  1. Oh Margaret. I love you and you make me weep this morning. The world is a grayer less imaginative place for not having the future work of Alexander McQueen in it.

  2. Thank you Ms. Cho for your inspired words. I now covet the 5 or 6 pieces I managed to afford. I am wearing my favorite today; in his honor. I never knew him either; but also thought I did in my psyche. He and his spirit reflect me and mine. He is missed. TERRIBLY

  3. i know what you mean. im traumatized since he has been a hero since i was ten. i cried all day yesterday, and probably will some more today. when i was a little girl i hoped to someday become rich and important enough simply to have Lee McQ design my wardrobe and Tim Burton design my house. (which of course was never happening anyway, and now is even less likely)

    and im so sad i will never meet him, although that was unlikely to begin with as well. its not like a musician (or beautiful comedian) where, even if you dont meet them, you can see them live and say that you were there…. i mean how the fuck would a civilian like me (and many of you) be able to see him?

    ive already decided im going to get a crown and mcq logo tattood on my ass (carebear style) or something… not sure yet.

    i wrote a blog about him too, about all the reasons he was great and important to me… with a collection of pictures and associated runway youtube links… i dont know if you read the stuff people put here but i will post just incase: http://www.facebook.com/ianawi?v=feed&story_fbid=312444443896#!/note.php?note_id=293500517561

    anyway, love you margaret, thanks for the beautiful blog, and love you lee <3 rest in fierceness.

  4. This was so beautiful. & the dress you choose of Alexander McQueen seems to suit your personality & beauty so perfectly.
    i can not wait to see a photo of you in it=)
    it is times like this we reflect on really enjoying the people & things we love. i am sure Alexander McQueen would be so pleased to read your lovely words. Much like your Alexander McQueen dress Margaret, you are a walking piece of art, Eloquent & full of surprises.
    Much Love,
    Bernie Dexter

  5. The guitar design sounds lovely.

    Love of beauty is taste. The creation of beauty is art.
    ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

    You may not recognize this, but you are beautiful already. Know that Beautiful Lee stays with you always.

    Thank you for sharing.

  6. Such a wonderful blog Margaret. I couldn’t believe it when I heard the news about him. Such a shame and a waste.

    The dress sounds gorgeous. Can’t wait to see it.

  7. Thank you for for posting this very personal blog, Margaret. I was extremely sad yesterday when I read the headline and spent hours looking at pictures, videos, etc. He was truly an amazing man, seemingly quiet and child-like yet with such a powerful voice and vision. Never bought any of the garments he created but have admired so many on the rack. So glad that you have that little part of him to treasure always. Peace.

  8. beautifully written, Margaret. I bet Alexander would love what you said about him here.

    also? I demand pics of you in this dress. :D I bet you look stunning in it!

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