The pope has just released a number of brand new sins! They include drugs, pollution and genetic manipulation. I am not sure how he gets to do this, but if he can, I think everyone should be able to! So here are some new sins from me (not in any particular orderâ€¦)
Tailgating. Thou shalt not drive too close to other cars. Mortal sin. People can get killed. One time, I was being tailgated so close on the freeway that it felt like the other car was raping my car. I mean it was a vehicular sexual assault. He kept pounding the back of my car until his car just blew up and sprawled across multiple lanes blocking traffic up for miles. Isn’t that just like a man?
Talking too loud in someone’s ear at a club. Thou shalt not try to talk over the booming techno beat, shattering your friendâ€™s eardrums and annoying everyone in the process. You donâ€™t even get heard, you strain your voice, you hurt their ears, no information is that important. Thou shalt wait til thou is outside.
Homophobia â€“ thou shalt not be a homophobe! (this is something the pope cannot get enough of!)
Sexism and racism in the presidential race. Thou shalt not try to use gender or racial stereotypes in order to undermine presidential candidates, no matter who thou might vote for!